The February People’s Choice goes to…..
The February People’s Choice Award Goes to…..
The people have spoken (well, sung)… The February People’s Choice Award goes to Mark Sherstinsky for his short play, THE MISSION, presented as a staged reading at Monday Night PlayGround on February 11th at the Broadwater Main Stage. Congratulations, Mark!
Courtesy of Mr. Sherstinsky, we’re pleased to share the first two pages from the award-winning script. Enjoy!
THE MISSION
by
Mark Sherstinsky
Characters:
ALISON female, 30s, Jewish
BUTTE male, 30s, Mormon, any race
AT THE BAR
LIGHTS UP on BUTTE in a bar. He sits on a chair in front of 2 drinks on a table. ALISON ENTERS and approaches BUTTE.
ALISON
Booty?…Butt?
BUTTE
(stands to greet her) Alison? Hi, it’s Butte (pronounced: ‘byoot’, like Montana).
ALISON
Butte. Of course. Like the city. Should have trusted my first instinct…(indicates phone)…The app doesn’t give pronouncers.
BUTTE
It’s ok. My brothers still call me Butt. They’re grown men and they think it’s funny.
ALISON
Sorry I’m so late. You been waiting long? Subway took forever and I couldn’t text. I actually thought you might be gone by now!
BUTTE
It’s ok, I always like to get to places early…(pulls chair out for ALISON)…And I didn’t want to miss meeting you. Do you drink whiskey? I ordered for us.
ALISON
(Sits)…No, actually. But thank you…So, Butte. Are you, like, from Montana?
BUTTE
Sort of. I’ve never actually been there as, like, a fully-formed real person.
ALISON
Oh okay but you’ve been to Montana as an alien? Wait, you made those crop circles?!
BUTTE
I’ve never been there out of the uterus…I was conceived on a kitchen table in Butte, so…
ALISON
Uh. Good story. I feel like I know, um…a lot…about you now.
BUTTE
How about you. Where are you from?
ALISON
Buffalo, New York. I’m pretty sure I was conceived in Buffalo, New York.
BUTTE
Mind if I call you Buffalo?
ALISON
(Smiles at his joke) Sure, if it makes you more comfortable…So, do you do this much?
BUTTE
Online dating? Sort of. You’re my fourth date this week.
ALISON
Oh. Okay…It’s Tuesday.
BUTTE
Two other dates yesterday, and one this morning.
ALISON
(To self)…He’s honest?…BEAT…(to BUTTE)…It’s kind of a turnoff, Butte. A guy who’s basically trying to date the shit out of the world.
BUTTE
It’s not what you think.
ALISON
Are you, like, super horny, or terminally ill or what?
BUTTE
No. I’m on a…mission. I guess I’m just trying to be…efficient.
ALISON
Yeah, what every girl gets really wet for! A guy who’s efficient…(drinks whiskey)
BUTTE
What about you? How often do you date people you meet on a phone app?
ALISON
This is my first time.
BUTTE
Hmm. You’re divorced, right, as per your profile…(drinks whiskey)
ALISON
Yep. Just got the divorce papers stamped yesterday…I’m hot off the press!
BUTTE
Okay. So I’m not the only one who’s efficient.
ALISON
I thought I’d observe the end of my shitty marriage by maybe meeting a new nicer guy. Or just a guy. I haven’t dated another man in twelve years…(drinks whiskey)
BUTTE
My brother, Bismarck, he got divorced too, just this year. Really ugly breakup.
ALISON
Bismarck? What…do your parents just like to fuck all over the Great Plains region?
BUTTE
My dad was a Mission president. For the LDS Church. He served where he was needed. So we moved around a lot.
ALISON
LDS. Latter-Day Saints?…You’re…Mormon?
BUTTE
Yep…(drinks whiskey)
ALISON
Are you allowed to drink? And are you allowed to date me?
BUTTE
Well, it’s complicated. But…no, I’m not allowed to do any…thing.
ALISON
(Stands)…You know, this is a bad idea. We’re very different, you and me. You’re Mormon…And I’m a librarian. I wish you luck in whatever mission you’re on…Thanks for the drink…Butte…(starts to exit).
BUTTE
(Stands)…Hey. Alison, I totally get it. Let me at least walk you to the subway. It’s late.
————
Join us for the Next Monday Night PlayGround of the season on Monday, March 11, at the Broadwater Main Stage and choose your own favorite. Click here for more info.